Hey beautifuls and happy holidays!
I'm sorry I missed you guys last week. We ended up having a last-minute family day together to celebrate Christmas Eve... I find that sometimes you just need to get away from it all and reload!
With that being said, Happy New Year's Eve!! Let me just preface this post with the fact that I am known to be a bit of a fuddy-duddy about this holiday. I love watching the ball drop as much as the next girl but what I don't love is the ridiculous New Year's resolutions everyone feels obligated to make, and I'll tell you why.
The tradition of making these resolutions is based in using an obvious time-marker as a moment to consciously put our best foot forward for the coming year. Nice, right? Right.
But what I often see as a result of this is my friends and family making resolutions based on the inherent feeling that they need to change something about themselves, that they somehow aren't enough the way they are at this very moment and they need to make an effort now so that they can reach that ever-transient "enough" in the future.
As far as the women in my life are concerned, most often these resolutions revolve around the physical changes we want to make to our bodies in order to be thinner or hotter or whatever, and that really gets me. Most of you guys know what I preach by now: you are beautiful and amazing and wonderful exactly the way you are, and you certainly don't need to change anything to be worthy of all the love and happiness in the world. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for self-improvement, but that improvement should be based on what's going to genuinely make you happier and healthier, not what will be more acceptable to your friends or what will lure in the hottest guys or what will make you more attractive to our society.
Take it from someone who has made this mistake one too many times:
I used to spend each New Year's Eve stuffing my face with the idea that come January 1st, my resolution to "finally lose the weight for good" would take effect and this time it would really stick. The first time I made that resolution was in 4th grade. Each year was the same pattern: I would stick with a diet/exercise plan for a few weeks, gradually get bored and be back to my usual ways without much to show for it.
However, when I made the same resolution at the beginning of 2010, the second half of my freshman year at college, it really stuck. I stopped eating almost entirely, subsisting on the one cup of miso soup I would allow myself each day. I started skipping classes to go to Bikram hot yoga, a welcome relief as I was freezing all the time. I stopped going out with my friends so they wouldn't see how strained my relationships had become; instead, I would go to the gym and spend 3 hours on the StairMaster, watching myself in the mirror and calling myself fat, telling myself that this was the punishment for a lifetime of overeating. And, not surprisingly, I lost 20 pounds. And it felt amazing and I could wear whatever I wanted and everyone told me how great I looked and all my guy friends were suddenly interested in me.
But what they couldn't see was that it wasn't actually amazing, that underneath that new, thin front, I was suffering. I was hungry and cold and sad and scared and even though I had this amazing new body, I didn't have the soul to fill it up anymore.
It took me years to recover from that New Year's resolution. Since then, I have discovered that the best resolutions you can make are those that will feed your mind, body and soul as one. I know it sounds a little earth-child of me, but really, if you're going to spend a whole year focusing on some major goal, shouldn't it be one that is going to add joy and happiness to your life instead of one that will force you to give up the things you love?
Now keep in mind, I'm all for self-improvement. I'm constantly looking for little tweaks to make my life a happier and overall healthier one. But in the same vein, realize that many of the body-based New Year's resolutions we make don't actually make us healthier or happier. Often they just make us miserable!
So how about this New Year, we try something different? Instead of making that same stale resolution to lose five pounds or tone your butt or whatever it is you freak out about, how about you focus instead on what will lead to not only a healthier body but a happier one?
Instead of resolving to "exercise more," make time for active recreation that makes you happy and that you can look forward to. There's no need to hit the gym when you can go for a hike, walk your dog on the beach, kayak at the lake, take a salsa class with that sexy man in your life, or even play tag with your nieces and nephews! Forget that "eat less" resolution, but work on nourishing your body by learning how to cook healthy, homemade meals, hitting the local farmer's market as a weekly date night or kicking some of those processed foods to the curb.
See what I mean? Resolutions can be at once a lot more fun and a lot more beneficial to your body and your soul if you take the time to consider what will make you genuinely happier and healthier not just for 2014 but for the rest of your life.
With that, I am off to enjoy tonight's obligatory glass of champagne and some homemade tamales (guilt-free!) before we embark on another beautiful year of growth and self-discovery. Happy new year and I'll see you in 2014.
That's the slice!
Sonja
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
A little bit of inspiration.
Hello beautifuls.
Today's blog is a bit of a cop-out on my part due to the fact that the phylogeny of vertebrate evolution is a lot more difficult to memorize than I thought it would be...
BUT never fear! Instead of writing an article, I decided to post a few of my favorite quotes about loving and accepting yourself and your body, quotes that I go back to when I'm having a hard time doing the same thing myself. I definitely think they'll speak to you, hopefully they'll inspire you, and just maybe you'll have one of those awesome "aha!" moments that so many of these have brought to me.
One of my favorite things about quotes, really good quotes, is that you can hang onto them. I keep a list of the ones that inspire me most on my phone so that I always have them with me for those moments I need a little push in the right direction. I truly believe that the attitude you have approaching problems big and small determines 99% of your success, and so when I just can't seem to put a smile on, sometimes I can find solace in these. Hopefully you can do the same!
So check it out! I find it most productive to read one of them, pause, and really consider it. I know that sounds so 6th grade ("don't forget to pause and think about what you've just read!"), but it really does help get the message across. Here are 8 of my favorite quotes about loving and accepting yourself just as you are:
There you have it! If you don't have time to go through and think on them right now, no worries. Maybe you can find a few minutes over the upcoming holiday to really meditate on a few of your favorites and see where that takes you!
If, on the other hand, you need a little something extra to get you through the holidays (which are unfortunately sometimes filled with the innane opinions of family and old friends about who you should be and how you should get there and why whatever you're doing right now is somehow wrong), I also maintain a Pinterest board where I pin tons of quotes and pictures that I find inspiring and encouraging. Check that out here: "One Size Does Not Fit All".
More than anything, just remember that, even if certain others don't recognize how amazing you are, even if you can't see it in yourself yet, you truly are beautiful and wonderful and inspiring, just the way you are. And once you realize that, nobody can take it away from you.
One more for the road, party rockers:
And that's the slice!
Enjoy,
Sonja
Today's blog is a bit of a cop-out on my part due to the fact that the phylogeny of vertebrate evolution is a lot more difficult to memorize than I thought it would be...
BUT never fear! Instead of writing an article, I decided to post a few of my favorite quotes about loving and accepting yourself and your body, quotes that I go back to when I'm having a hard time doing the same thing myself. I definitely think they'll speak to you, hopefully they'll inspire you, and just maybe you'll have one of those awesome "aha!" moments that so many of these have brought to me.
One of my favorite things about quotes, really good quotes, is that you can hang onto them. I keep a list of the ones that inspire me most on my phone so that I always have them with me for those moments I need a little push in the right direction. I truly believe that the attitude you have approaching problems big and small determines 99% of your success, and so when I just can't seem to put a smile on, sometimes I can find solace in these. Hopefully you can do the same!
So check it out! I find it most productive to read one of them, pause, and really consider it. I know that sounds so 6th grade ("don't forget to pause and think about what you've just read!"), but it really does help get the message across. Here are 8 of my favorite quotes about loving and accepting yourself just as you are:
There you have it! If you don't have time to go through and think on them right now, no worries. Maybe you can find a few minutes over the upcoming holiday to really meditate on a few of your favorites and see where that takes you!
If, on the other hand, you need a little something extra to get you through the holidays (which are unfortunately sometimes filled with the innane opinions of family and old friends about who you should be and how you should get there and why whatever you're doing right now is somehow wrong), I also maintain a Pinterest board where I pin tons of quotes and pictures that I find inspiring and encouraging. Check that out here: "One Size Does Not Fit All".
More than anything, just remember that, even if certain others don't recognize how amazing you are, even if you can't see it in yourself yet, you truly are beautiful and wonderful and inspiring, just the way you are. And once you realize that, nobody can take it away from you.
One more for the road, party rockers:
And that's the slice!
Enjoy,
Sonja
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
VS Fashion Show (Round Two)
Alright, ladies, today's the day, the day when millions of beautiful and amazing young women will sit themselves down in front of their TVs with a pint of Haagen Dazs and try to figure out where they went wrong, why they will never have the big breasts or the slim waist or the long, lanky legs society demands from them... Today is the day of the annual Victoria's Secret Fashion show.
Before we dive in, I just want to put the disclaimer out there that I'm not saying you can't watch the show or even that you shouldn't watch it. I love the spectacle of the thing just as much as you do! Who doesn't want to see a $10 million bra paraded down the runway amidst a surely even-more expensive production?
What you aren't allowed to do is sit there and wallow in your own misfortune, wishing you could look like one of those women.
Why, you ask?
Well, first of all, if you've been following me for a while, you'll remember that in my last post about the VS Fashion Show, I explored a professional make-up artist's take on how to pull off the VS look. (If you haven't read that post or would like a little refresher, find it here: "Victoria's little secrets.") Spoiler alert: throw in some extensions, a fake tan and some HAC-ing and we could all look like a VS Angel.
Still not convinced? I have proof (a picture's worth a thousand words, after all). I give to you, for your viewing pleasure, the transformation of a VS Angel, from untouched to photo- or runway-ready:
I'm not the best at recognizing faces, but I'm being honest when I say that if I saw some of these women on the street in normal dress, I really don't think I'd recognize them as models. In no way am I trying to suggest they aren't beautiful, they're just normal women like you and me.
Feeling a bit better? Now remember that these beauties don't just go walking around looking like they just got off the runway every day; it takes hours (sometimes even days) of intensive beauty care by industry professionals to get these women looking their best, and that's after all of the months spent with personal trainers and nutritionists.
Adriana Lima (the brunette in the first picture) has spoken at length to the amount of work that goes into her preparation for the show, including "twice-daily workouts, drinking gallons of water (literally) every day, a high-protein diet" and a full-out, liquids-only diet leading up to the show. And that's before the hours of professional work. Doutzen Kroes, another Angel, further told the New York Post, "Sometimes it makes me feel guilty now that I am in this profession that makes... girls insecure. I always say, I don't look like [that]."
Just think about this for a second: looking fantastic come show-time is these women's lives. It's their job. They are paid millions of dollars a year to look the way they do at this show, and they don't do it on their own. If you had a personal trainer, a personal chef, and a dozen hair and make-up experts working on you day and night,, don't you think you'd look a lot closer to that ideal you're always aiming for?
But you know what? That's not your life and it's not your job and it's not your responsibility, no matter how much society would like you to think so.
I'm going to guess that you're a lot like me. You probably have two or three more commitments in the air than any sane woman would take on, on top of trying to balance school and a job and maybe even a relationship with a healthy lifestyle. Sound familiar? Right. So why in the name of that catrillion-dollar bra do you expect yourself to look like a model while you're doing it? Unless you're willing to spend 8+ hours a day making this your one and only goal, you shouldn't.
And you know what else? You are brilliant and amazing and wonderful at what YOU do, and that is plenty. So go, watch the show, but keep in mind that you are just as worthy and just as wonderful as those Angels, and as long as you're doing your best in your own life, that is more than enough.
Enjoy the slice,
Sonja
Before we dive in, I just want to put the disclaimer out there that I'm not saying you can't watch the show or even that you shouldn't watch it. I love the spectacle of the thing just as much as you do! Who doesn't want to see a $10 million bra paraded down the runway amidst a surely even-more expensive production?
What you aren't allowed to do is sit there and wallow in your own misfortune, wishing you could look like one of those women.
Why, you ask?
Well, first of all, if you've been following me for a while, you'll remember that in my last post about the VS Fashion Show, I explored a professional make-up artist's take on how to pull off the VS look. (If you haven't read that post or would like a little refresher, find it here: "Victoria's little secrets.") Spoiler alert: throw in some extensions, a fake tan and some HAC-ing and we could all look like a VS Angel.
Still not convinced? I have proof (a picture's worth a thousand words, after all). I give to you, for your viewing pleasure, the transformation of a VS Angel, from untouched to photo- or runway-ready:
I'm not the best at recognizing faces, but I'm being honest when I say that if I saw some of these women on the street in normal dress, I really don't think I'd recognize them as models. In no way am I trying to suggest they aren't beautiful, they're just normal women like you and me.
Feeling a bit better? Now remember that these beauties don't just go walking around looking like they just got off the runway every day; it takes hours (sometimes even days) of intensive beauty care by industry professionals to get these women looking their best, and that's after all of the months spent with personal trainers and nutritionists.
Adriana Lima (the brunette in the first picture) has spoken at length to the amount of work that goes into her preparation for the show, including "twice-daily workouts, drinking gallons of water (literally) every day, a high-protein diet" and a full-out, liquids-only diet leading up to the show. And that's before the hours of professional work. Doutzen Kroes, another Angel, further told the New York Post, "Sometimes it makes me feel guilty now that I am in this profession that makes... girls insecure. I always say, I don't look like [that]."
Just think about this for a second: looking fantastic come show-time is these women's lives. It's their job. They are paid millions of dollars a year to look the way they do at this show, and they don't do it on their own. If you had a personal trainer, a personal chef, and a dozen hair and make-up experts working on you day and night,, don't you think you'd look a lot closer to that ideal you're always aiming for?
But you know what? That's not your life and it's not your job and it's not your responsibility, no matter how much society would like you to think so.
I'm going to guess that you're a lot like me. You probably have two or three more commitments in the air than any sane woman would take on, on top of trying to balance school and a job and maybe even a relationship with a healthy lifestyle. Sound familiar? Right. So why in the name of that catrillion-dollar bra do you expect yourself to look like a model while you're doing it? Unless you're willing to spend 8+ hours a day making this your one and only goal, you shouldn't.
And you know what else? You are brilliant and amazing and wonderful at what YOU do, and that is plenty. So go, watch the show, but keep in mind that you are just as worthy and just as wonderful as those Angels, and as long as you're doing your best in your own life, that is more than enough.
Enjoy the slice,
Sonja
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Transformation tuesday!
Hey y'all! (I spent Thanksgiving with an amazing Southern family and I'm feelin' the vibe.)
You guys know how much I love internet phenomena, so it should come as no surprise that today I'm drawing from yet another picture that's making its rounds in the online community this week. What's a bit different than usual is that it's actually something positive!
You know those before-and-after photos you see in essentially every weight-loss commercial/ad/etc. known to man? Yeah, me too. You know how they make you feel like you're some great, unfinished work and if you could just lose that weight that drives you crazy, you could be as happy as those "after" picture people? Yeah, ME TOO.
So you can only imagine how much it brightened my day when I found this gem from fitness blogger Mel V.:
(Sorry about the awkward sizing, I'm still figuring out the blogging world!)
Here's the full caption that she posted with this photo:
"Check out my transformation! It took me 15 minutes. Wanna know my secret? Well firstly I ditched the phonewallet (fwallet) cause that thing is lame, swapped my bather bottoms to black (cause they're a size bigger and black is slimming), Smothered on some fake tan, clipped in my hair extensions, stood up a bit taller, sucked in my guts, popped my hip- threw in a skinny arm, stood a bit wider #boxgap, pulled my shoulders back and added a bit of cheeky/Im so proud of my results smile. Zoomed in on the before pic- zoomed out on the after & a filter. Cos' filters make everything awesome. What's my point? Don't be deceived by what you see in magazines & on Instagram.. You never see the dozens of other pics they took that wernt as flattering. Photoshop can make a pig look hotter than Beyonce."
Cue round of applause!
I actually went to Mel V.'s blog to check out what she's up to, and it turns out this whole "screw the transformation pictures" thing is like, a movement or something.
Here's another one for all the guys out there reading along! This is Andrew Dixon, a personal trainer:
The caption on this one reads:
"I decided to take my own transformation photos to see what was possible with just a few easy tweaks... I was feeling particularly bloated on the day, so I asked my girlfriend to take a before shot. I then shaved my head, face and chest and prepared for the after shot, which was about an hour after I took the before shot. I did a few push ups and chin ups, tweaked my bedroom lighting, sucked in, tightened my abs and BOOM! We got our after shot. As you can see, I'm no bodybuilder, but I had enough muscle on me to catch some shadows from the all-important overhead lighting."
Here's another one he did where he tries to replicate "a few months of hard work and dieting" over the course of an hour:
Another round of applause?
Alright, enough clapping. In all seriousness, I think that seeing these is so important for us because we live in what Mr. Dixon calls "a world of manipulation, false promises and exaggeration." We all see those before-and-after photos and we wish we could be the "after"s- by Christmas or by our next birthday or by our next big date even, we could be thin, tan, beautiful, and (supposedly) so much happier. But you know what? Just like the high fashion ads I'm always ragging on, these transformations aren't real. Not even close.
I'm going to quote Mr. Dixon again here because he really just gets what I'm all about:
"Forget about the quick transformations and focus on a life of healthy eating, well-managed stress levels, quality sleep and plenty of movement. Spend time with people who have similar goals and values and take time to appreciate yourself the way you are right now. Don't beat yourself up if you eat a cookie, just enjoy that cookie and everything else life has to offer.
We all spend too much time sucking in our guts, trying to look the way we think society thinks we should. Don't waste any more energy trying to compete with everyone else.
It's all smoke and mirrors."
Boom. If that doesn't inspire you, I don't know what will.
Also, I know a lot of us are entering that high-stress period of finals that drives students crazy, so if this is you, please try to remember that your well-being is the single most important thing in your life. Take care of yourself, take care of your body and keep everything in perspective- just like a few pounds don't decide your future, neither does a test. Trust me: I've been there, I've failed that test, and I lived to tell the tale.
Alright ladies and gentlemen, that's the slice!
Much love,
Sonja
You guys know how much I love internet phenomena, so it should come as no surprise that today I'm drawing from yet another picture that's making its rounds in the online community this week. What's a bit different than usual is that it's actually something positive!
You know those before-and-after photos you see in essentially every weight-loss commercial/ad/etc. known to man? Yeah, me too. You know how they make you feel like you're some great, unfinished work and if you could just lose that weight that drives you crazy, you could be as happy as those "after" picture people? Yeah, ME TOO.
So you can only imagine how much it brightened my day when I found this gem from fitness blogger Mel V.:
(Sorry about the awkward sizing, I'm still figuring out the blogging world!)
Here's the full caption that she posted with this photo:
"Check out my transformation! It took me 15 minutes. Wanna know my secret? Well firstly I ditched the phonewallet (fwallet) cause that thing is lame, swapped my bather bottoms to black (cause they're a size bigger and black is slimming), Smothered on some fake tan, clipped in my hair extensions, stood up a bit taller, sucked in my guts, popped my hip- threw in a skinny arm, stood a bit wider #boxgap, pulled my shoulders back and added a bit of cheeky/Im so proud of my results smile. Zoomed in on the before pic- zoomed out on the after & a filter. Cos' filters make everything awesome. What's my point? Don't be deceived by what you see in magazines & on Instagram.. You never see the dozens of other pics they took that wernt as flattering. Photoshop can make a pig look hotter than Beyonce."
Cue round of applause!
I actually went to Mel V.'s blog to check out what she's up to, and it turns out this whole "screw the transformation pictures" thing is like, a movement or something.
Here's another one for all the guys out there reading along! This is Andrew Dixon, a personal trainer:
The caption on this one reads:
"I decided to take my own transformation photos to see what was possible with just a few easy tweaks... I was feeling particularly bloated on the day, so I asked my girlfriend to take a before shot. I then shaved my head, face and chest and prepared for the after shot, which was about an hour after I took the before shot. I did a few push ups and chin ups, tweaked my bedroom lighting, sucked in, tightened my abs and BOOM! We got our after shot. As you can see, I'm no bodybuilder, but I had enough muscle on me to catch some shadows from the all-important overhead lighting."
Here's another one he did where he tries to replicate "a few months of hard work and dieting" over the course of an hour:
Another round of applause?
Alright, enough clapping. In all seriousness, I think that seeing these is so important for us because we live in what Mr. Dixon calls "a world of manipulation, false promises and exaggeration." We all see those before-and-after photos and we wish we could be the "after"s- by Christmas or by our next birthday or by our next big date even, we could be thin, tan, beautiful, and (supposedly) so much happier. But you know what? Just like the high fashion ads I'm always ragging on, these transformations aren't real. Not even close.
I'm going to quote Mr. Dixon again here because he really just gets what I'm all about:
"Forget about the quick transformations and focus on a life of healthy eating, well-managed stress levels, quality sleep and plenty of movement. Spend time with people who have similar goals and values and take time to appreciate yourself the way you are right now. Don't beat yourself up if you eat a cookie, just enjoy that cookie and everything else life has to offer.
We all spend too much time sucking in our guts, trying to look the way we think society thinks we should. Don't waste any more energy trying to compete with everyone else.
It's all smoke and mirrors."
Boom. If that doesn't inspire you, I don't know what will.
Also, I know a lot of us are entering that high-stress period of finals that drives students crazy, so if this is you, please try to remember that your well-being is the single most important thing in your life. Take care of yourself, take care of your body and keep everything in perspective- just like a few pounds don't decide your future, neither does a test. Trust me: I've been there, I've failed that test, and I lived to tell the tale.
Alright ladies and gentlemen, that's the slice!
Much love,
Sonja
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